Love is enough
by MidnightOwls
Summary: Takes place after prom. Obvi Mer/Der...Will love ever be enough for the two of them?
1. After Prom

**I posted this fic when I was about 15. It was terrible, I changed a few things up and made it a masterpiece! Tell me if I should post up more :) **

**Disclaimer: ***I don't own the show just this story******

*Scene leaves off at Prom*

Derek stares into Meredith's eyes. She is so beautiful, so kind, so…everything he has always wanted. Addison was an obligation, Meredith was his heart. She meant everything to him. He was complete with her. Looking into her eyes he can see just how much he has hurt her. The thought made his heart ache.

Meredith stared at Derek. He was the love of her life. At one point she saw herself building a future with this man starting a family with him. She cannot just erase the hurt he caused her. She was finally moving on. Finn was not a one night stand, he was a stable relationship for her. She was starting to finally feel happy. But Derek looked at her while they were dancing. All her feelings came rushing back. She cannot deny what they just did. She was not sure she even wanted to she just wants no needs to get away from it all. Finally Derek interrupted her thoughts.

"Meredith" He just looked at her gave her his McDreamy smile. The one that always won her over. This time however his smile wouldn't work. Finally Finn spoke up.

Finn: "Meredith?"

Meredith just stared back and forth between the two men. She faintly sees Addison in the background with a confused look on her face. That is when she realizes no matter what they just did Derek was still married. Now she was officially a home wrecker. The thought made her sick to her stomach.

"Finn can you just give me a ride back, I'm tired," Meredith said.

"Yeah, come on lets go." Finn said. He takes Meredith's hand and kisses her on the cheek. Derek flinched at the contact. He had a million thoughts racing through his head. _Did she really just choose him?_ His body ached as he watched her walk away. His hand were clenched at his side. Something told him he would never have the chance to tell her how much he loved her. He had to tell her.

Addison witnessed the whole encounter. Something seemed wrong. She needed to get to Derek, take him home and make him forget Meredith Grey.

Addison walked up to Derek and wrapped her arms around him. "Hey, you ready to go home?" Addison said.

Derek gave her a look of utter fear. Instinctively she knew the next thing he was going to say would hurt her unimaginably. "I'm sorry Addison, but I have to tell her." Derek says. "Tell her wh-" Addison started but she was interrupted by Derek rushing past her to chasing after Meredith. "Meredith…..Meredith." Derek yelled after her.

Meredith kept her head down and just kept walking. She pretended she didn't hear him. Suddenly his words made her stop. "Meredith wait...I love you." Derek proclaimed. Meredith stopped dead in her tracks. Addison's face fell, Richard, Baily, Finn, and Adel all stared in disbelief. He just proclaimed his love for her in front of everyone.

Meredith finally turned and faced Derek. Her words were so true and rocked him to his core. "Derek. I have waited so long to hear you say that….but now it is too late… you're too late." She turned back and walked out with Finn. Little did Derek know what was going to lay in his future.

**SOOOOOOO?**


	2. That Night

So I'm in college but I promise a chapter a week

"_Derek. I have waited so long to hear you say that….but now it is too late… you're too late." She turned back and walked out with Finn. Little did Derek know what was going to lay in his future._

On the way drive back to Meredith's house the car was silent. Meredith's mind reeling about the events that night; Denny dying, prom, words…. All of the words said to Derek, all the words said Derek said to her…and of course the big huge mistake that she just did. The mistake that has her sitting in a car with Finn with no panties on, and honestly still dripping wet. She silently cursed herself. Only Derek and his hands, his hair, his voice, more importantly his mouth can make her instantly wet and want him so bad. She was already aching where his hands and mouth and breathe left her bare. She looked over at Finn. He never made her feel that way. Hell she never gave him the opportunity to make her feel that way. That was beside the point. Looking over at Finn she knows she has to end it. She knows she cannot let this relationship go on anymore. Poor Finn, he never really got a chance. For her it has always has and always will be Derek. He was her it. The bad part was that he was married and that will probably never change.

Finally they pulled up to her house. Meredith turned in her seat. "Finn…" He looks at her with an almost hopeful look. "Yes?" Meredith takes a deep breathe. "Finn I am so sorry. So sorry. So so so sorry." Finn's face drops a little. "Finn I am sorry but I cannot do this. Honestly as cliché as this sounds, it wasn't you it's me." Meredith quickly opens the door and runs into her house, never giving Finn the chance to speak.

Once she got in her house she slammed the door and leaned against it. Gasping for air her version blurred, her head was pounding, and her body was on fire. Everywhere Derek touched her she burned. She knew that Izzie was upstairs, and she knew that she should be a good friend and check on her but at this point she just wanted to run. She wanted to run as far away as possible. Meredith ran up to her room, grabbed a suitcase, and started frantically throwing clothes and shower products in the bag. Finally she opened the drawer on her night stand and pulled out a picture of her and Derek when they were happy and throws it against her bedroom wall. Seeing the broken glass and the picture frame she sank down on the bed. Slowly she pulls out two pieces of papers and pen from the same drawer.

_Dear George, Izzie, and Alex,_

_I am so sorry. I could not work up the nerve to just walk down the hall and talk to you guys. I cannot do this anymore. I cannot go to work every day and pretend to be okay. I cannot keep going on day to day like this. I have to leave. I promise when I get settled I will call you guys. Please do not tell Derek where I am. I hope he is happy with his wife. Izzie, I am so sorry I am leaving you like this but you will be strong. You will survive this. Denny will always be with you. I love you. George, pull your head out of your ass and quit playing games with Callie. Either shit in the pot or get off or however that goes. George take care of Izzie please. Alex, you have always been like my big brother, don't be too hard on Derek. Please take care of everyone. Guys I love you all and I will be in touch._

_Love, Meredith _

Meredith takes a shaky breath and starts the second letter.

_Dear Cristina,_

_It's clear I am not fine. I give up Cristina. I slept with Derek at prom. I am officially a filthy mistress. I'll call you as soon as I get where I am supposed to be. You will always be my person. _

_Love,_

_Meredith_

Meredith folds the two letters and places them on her bed. She quickly and quietly takes her suitcase and loads them in her car. Still in her prom dress she drives to the airport looking for the earliest flight to the only other place she thought of as home than Seattle.

MERDERMERDERMERDERMERDER

Derek was a mess. After Meredith left Derek told Addison to go home and he stayed at the hospital. So now three hours later he long changed out of his tux and into the navy attending scrubs and Derek was pacing. If you could wear a hole in the floor there would be one. In the last three hours Derek decided that he was divorcing Addison. He could never love her like he loved Mer. He pulled out the divorce papers from the last time. Without hesitation Derek slid off his wedding ring and signed the papers. Now he just needed to tell Addison. He needed to tell her everything; he needed to tell her the truth. After he told Addison he needed to find Meredith. He needed to tell her how he felt. That he loved her. Finally with a smile on his face Derek felt like a new man. Too bad in less than ten hours his whole world would be shaken again.


	3. It's over

Derek walked into the trailer. Addison was lying in bed; Derek could tell by her breathing that she was not asleep. The sounds of his footsteps caused Addison to sit up and look at Derek. She could tell that this was it. She had a feeling at prom that her marriage was not going to withstand much more. Derek sat on the edge of the bed. That was when Addison noticed his bare hand. Her eyes filled with tears. She was a failure it was the end.

"Derek…."

"Addison… I am so sorry but I can't"

"You love her."

"I'm sorry, I….yes I do I love her."

"Derek. How did we get here?"

"Addie I don't know. We aren't the same people."

Addison got off the bed and went to her closet. She felt numb everything. But for some reason she actually felt relieved.

"Addie what are you doing?"

"I'm leaving."

"Leaving? Where are you going? Back to New York?"

"Derek don't get your hopes up Seattle had actually grown on me. I think I am going to stay here awhile. I am gonna go get a hotel I think."

"Addison, I can leave you can stay here."

"Derek, I said Seattle has grown on me, not the wilderness. This is yours you stay here, I will gladly go get a hotel room."

It surprised Derek how easy she was taking this. He reached in his briefcase and pulled out the papers and looked at Addison.

"I already signed them. " Derek mentioned the stack of papers.

"Oh, uhm well okay. You are not wasting anytime?"

"Addie…"

"No its fine really. It's actually sad that we saved these in hopes that this will not work out. I'll sign them and call my lawyer in the morning to work out belongings and money."

"Addie I do not want anything. Whats mine is mine and what's yours in yours. You can have the properties in New York. My life is here now."

"Okay, yeah that will work out I guess. "

She took the stack of papers and finished packing up her last few things."

"Okay Derek I am out of here I'll come by another time to get the rest of our stuff."

Addison reached down and kissed his cheek.

"I'll always love you."

"I'll always love you too."

"But you're not in love with me."

"Addie…"

"Bye Derek."

"Bye Addison."

With that Addison walked out of the trailer. A few moments later Derek heard her car start up. Leaning back in the bed Derek sighed a breath of relief now he needeed to go get the love of his life. Looking over at the clock it was 3:27 am. Meredith was either asleep or drunk, knowing Meredith she was probably drunk. With that Derek closed his eyes. He will go for her tomorrow.


	4. That Morning

That morning Derek woke up feeling rejuvenated. He quickly showered and dressed. Normally it takes him an hour on his hair. He could not wait to get to Meredith so this morning it only took thirty minutes. He dressed In his red shirt that was Meredith's favorite. Taking one last final look in the mirror Derek smiled and left heading towards Meredith's house. Once Derek pulled into Meredith's driveway something felt wrong. Knocking on the door, Cristina answer it.

"Hi Cristina, is Meredith here."

"Go to hell."

Cristina slammed the door. Derek knocked again. Hoping she would answer. Only no one answered. So Derek sat in the porch and hoping Meredith would come outside. After two hours Derek got up and knocked again. This time Alex answered.

"What do you want Dr. Shepherd?"

"Is Meredith there?"

"No McDreamy. She freakin' left. Are you happy?"

"What do you mean? Where is she? Is she at the hospital?"

"No she's gone. She left. No one knows where she went."

"Did you call her? She can't be gone."

Derek's head was spinning. She couldn't be gone. He was finally making things right

"Dude, you messed up she is gone. She wrote us letters."

"Did she- Is there- for me?"

"No, now I suggest that you leave before Yang comes out her and kicks your ass."

"Oh I um I guess."

Derek got into his car and took off he could not believe this. His eyes filled with tears. He lost her. She was gone. His life was going to be hell.

Meredith landed in Boston. The only other place she has called home. This whole thing was a mess, but she loved Derek more than anything. She could not sit back and watch him with Addison any more. The best solution was to leave and that is exactly what Meredith did. She caught a cab to the house her and her mother used to live in when she was younger. Unlocking the door she walked into the house and looked around. She had so much to do. She needed to call Boston General and see if she can get into the intern program there. She needed to call Cristina see if she will send some of her stuff here. But right now all Meredith wanted to do was sleep. Climbing the stairs to her old room, Meredith found a spot on her old bed. 

**Three months later. . . . .**

Meredith was tired. Extremely tired everything hurt. What do expect out of a 47 hour shift. Ever since she left Seattle Meredith threw herself into work. She has no friends at Boston. She has a hard time opening herself up to anyone. Walking into her house she dropped her bag at the front door and collapsed on the couch. Within minutes she was asleep. A couple hours later she woke up to her stomach turning. It had been for the last week or so. Meredith just told herself it was from working a lot and skipping meals. Usually she ignored it, tonight however she could not ignore it. She launched herself off the couch and barely made it to the bathroom. Finally she could not put it off anymore she reached under the bathroom cabinet and searched for something she bought last week at the grocery store but was too scared to use it. Pulling out the test Meredith sat on the toilet and took it. Her heart was pounding after what had to be the longest three minutes in her life she looked down.

Meredith was having a Mcbaby.


	5. The email

"It's so sad can't we tell him." Izzie just stared at Derek and looked at her friends. It was a typical conversation, she asked almost daily. Ever since Meredith called them and told them were she was a few weeks ago, Izzie wanted to end Derek's misery. When Derek found out Meredith left he had took two weeks off from the hospital. No one knew where he was… the only thing they knew was that he was getting a divorce and that was only because Addison had taken no time from the hospital and she also wasted no time changing her name back to Montgomery and she also stopped wearing her wedding ring the day after "prom." When Derek got back from his two week oasis he was not himself. He never smiled, he was always grumpy and if it wasn't for the chief he would be a drunk. The chief saved Derek after he got brought into the hospital from being knocked out. . . in a bar fight.

"No" Cristina barked. Last night Meredith called Cristina in tears and told her about the baby. Meredith and Cristina's relationship was stronger than ever. Her and Meredith talked almost every day. Of course the other interns did not realize how much they talked, but Meredith left during a scary time in not only her life but also her best friend's. Burke's recovery was not fast and he was still having problems keeping his hand steady, the beginning right after being shot Cristina was so scared, if it wasn't for Meredith being her voice of reason she would have bolted from the relationship. Meredith was her person. Derek hurt her person. Therefore he had hurt her. Cristina had avoided working with Derek but now that Meredith told her about the baby she was hoping to work with him and make his life miserable.

"But Cristina look at him he is not the same person. She took part of him with her."

Cristina just rolled her eyes. If only Barbie knew. Izzie was a hopeless romantic even after the death of Denny. It took her awhile but now she thinks every person has a soul mate. Cristina was a realist. She figured that Barbie was lucky the chief was dumb enough to let her get her job back. Anything she was said to Cristina in the last few months Cristina hardly paid attention to.

Just then Baily came up to them.

"Okay you too stop staring!"

"Dr. Baily! I wasn't staring I was-" Izzie stuttered.

"Yes you are. Izzie you have a look of desperation to help him in your eyes and Cristina looks like she might kill someone. Cristina you had better get over it because you are working with him today. I know you lost your friend because of him but it's time to forgive him."

"Dr. Baily with all due respect don't talk to me about Meredith, because you will never begin to grasp how big this situation is. I will put my problems to the side the best I can to work with him but do not expect me to ever forget what Shepherd did to my person. " With that Cristina walked up to Derek ready to start her day.

"Dr. Shepherd I am your intern today." Cristina said in the bitchiest tone ever.

"Okay. Dr. Yang here our my patients will you please make sure they are prepped and you are familiar with the procedures you are scrubbing in today on both of them." Derek handed her two charts and headed towards his office.

Once he got inside his office Derek sat at his desk and reached into his bottom drawer, he pulled out a picture of the woman that made his chest ache. He missed her more than anything. She was his everything, she still is. The familiar pressure starting building up behind his eyes. It was a few seconds later he realized he was crying. It was that moment his email beeped notifying him of a new message. It was from an address he did not recognize with no subject title. Curiosity got the best of him and he went to check it.

_Derek._ The direct opening of the email put him on alert.

_The only reason I am sending this to you is because I refuse to let my child endure what I had to endure. To know that I had a father that just had nothing to do with me. If anyone knew I was sending this to you I would probably be killed. Especially Cristina. But the truth is Derek I miss you so much everything hurts and has hurt for the last three months. The thing, is this hurt is just the dull constant reminder of what I'm missing. It is nothing compared to the piercing pain I would be in if I was in Seattle and saw you every day with someone that wasn't me. I love you so much that I will accepts this for what it is. Me and you were not to be forever. I was meant to be your rebound from a cheating wife. Anyways I'm rambling. Remember I do this when I am nervous. I'll just get this over with. I'm pregnant. Its ours. I never slept with Finn. I'm not telling you this with an expectation of anything, just telling you so you know. I promise I'll keep you informed on the baby's life. Honestly I will probably be back in Seattle soon. If you would like I will have it in Seattle, but Derek do not rush me home. Do not try to find me. Just know that I will be back before I have the baby. I'm sorry Derek. No matter what we were meant to be I will always love you even if you don't love me._

_~M_

That was all it took for Derek to lose it. He knew after the moment he read the first sentence that this was sent from Meredith. She was pregnant. He was going to be a daddy. He knew nothing about her pregnancy. She had to be at least three months. The only thing he had to look forward was that she would be back here in Seattle within six months. And that reality made him send her an email back hopefully she would understand that they were a forever thing and that he loved her more than anything in her entire life. He clicked reply

_Mere,. . ._


	6. Stand Down

**_Sorry for the looooonnnggg delay. This thing called life got in the way. There was college, babies, kids, funerals, gradutions that distracted me. I have found myself with a little extra time and decided to update. This is not forgotten. Try to update at least once a week~~~~~~ ENJOYYYYY_**

_Mere, _

_I guess to say sorry would be pointless now, but mere I am so sorry. The day you walked out of this hospital something of mine walked with you. You are my everything. Addison means nothing to me compared to what you meant to me. I love you. I know its late, I know I should have told you a long time ago, but I have loved you since the day I met you. I did not want to tell you in an email and make this hard on you but it is true. Since the day you left everything reminds me of you. You are everywhere. I see you in the hospital, I hear you in the halls, I see you out in my woods, at Joe's , the ferryboat. You are everything to me and I need you. I know this is selfish and I know the chance of you actually taking me back are slim but I please come back sooner rather than later. We will figure the baby thing out together. You are making me a father and I promise I will be there for every diaper change, every feeding, every tear. You will not be alone on this. I will make everything up to you. Just please come back. I did not think it was possible to love you more but I do. You are giving me the greatest gift of them all. A baby. Please I need you. I cannot function without you. I cannot move on with my life if you are not a part of it. I love you more than anything in this world. Please come back to me. _

_Love, _

_Derek_

After hitting send Derek had tears streaming down his face. He was going to be a dad. This should be the best news ever. Derek can't help but think that he and Meredith should be together right now and be celebrating. He should be with her to hold her. He should be getting up with her on the mornings she is sick. He should be rubbing her stomach at night. He should be calling his family and telling them he was finally going to be a father. He should be doing a lot of things. They should be doing a lot of things. Together.

Derek messed that up. He ruined it. Derek knew that he has to fix it. No longer was it just Meredith and Derek. It was now Meredith, Derek, and baby. There was a little life to think about. An innocent baby that does not deserve to be this situation that was caused by it's father. The more Derek thought about it, the more upset he became. How could he already be ruining his child's life. What does that say about him? What kind of father will he be if he is already messing things up?

After getting all worked up Derek emerged from his office. He know he must look fifty shades of crazy running through the halls looking for the chief but he did not care. Finally Derek spotted Richard at the nurse's station. "Chief" Derek yelled in a strained voice.

"Derek what can I do for you? Are you okay?" The chief stopped what he was doing with the chart and just stared at Derek.

"Chief… Meredith…. Baby…. I need…." Derek rambles on. So much was running through his head at this point. Nothing was making sense. He could not control one thought.

"Derek, Derek, Derek… slow down… Calm down tell me what do you need."

"Chief I need to go. I need a few days off. Some things just turned up in my personal life and I need to take care of everything."

"Derek lets go in my office and talk."

Richard and Derek walked down to the office. Everyone that Derek passed was staring. Once in the office Derek sat down and Richard just stared at him for a moment. Richard noticed the he was just a shell of a man. His eyes were red rimmed and no longer had the sparkle in them that they used too. He looked to have aged as well. Richard realized that he was broken. Richard had a feeling that the intern that recently left had a lot to do with it.

"Derek start at the beginning. Talk to me. What is going on?"

"Chief after Meredith left she took something with me. A big something. Everyday I go to work because these halls remind me of her. Sometimes I feel like I smell her on the elevator. I do not exist without her. It's been months since I heard from her. Today I had an email from her. She's pregnant. I am going to be a daddy. That is something I have waited my whole life to be. She is making me one, but I am not there. When I saw myself having kids, I saw myself being there when we found out. Holding her hand every step of the way. I never thought I would be told through an email with the love of my life somewhere I don't even know. I can't… I won't do it. I have to find her. Bring her back. I don't know. I just don't know." Derek sounded so defeated. Richard was worried he never has seen him like this. Meredith has always been like a daughter to him. To Richard Mere was always a priority, but this man looked so desperate.

"Derek… going to find her would be the wrong thing to do and quite frankly very selfish. I know there is a child involved but you need to let Meredith come on her own when she is ready. You hurt her, you have to wait until she heals herself. Now take the rest of the day to pull yourself together and then be back here in two days. I will worry about your surgeries and appointments for the next few days. Go home."

Derek put his head into his hands. He knows the Chief is right. He is going to have to wait until the next email. He is going to have to convince her. Show her he has changed. He is going to have to figure out a way to show her that he picked her, he chose her, he loves her.


End file.
